Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Closing her chapter.

I went for a wedding on Saturday; the Church service. A friend of mine was getting married to a sweetheart. I love weddings- I make sense of them; I'm a freak for aesthetic value. So I prefer the Church service to the reception. I am not going to tell you how the service went, I want to touch on a number of points in today's post so won't have time for that.

Well, going to the wedding, I anticipated to see her coz she is a close friend of the bride nonetheless I was fine, no quaking. I was going to be G.

So church was going on when this graceful light skinned belle walked in in a short black evening dress. Don't worry, I didn't faint...lol. She still looked great. I only saw her from the back but she sat a small distance from me. Later on, I noticed the boyfriend was there with her and I thought, "How noble".

After service ended I greeted some friends I hadn't seen in a while which was great but didn't seem to see her. I didn't mind really, till I began walking to the stage to grab a taxi....Lonesomeness invites deep thought so I began thinking again about her and him. That Saturday I did think about her a whole lot.

However, Monday came. I had an appointment with a friend and as we talked about the biz, I saw her pic and his on a brochure and it struck me. This is what I wanted. I did not particularly want her back in my life, I just wanted to know she was happy. And seeing them here on the brochure as well as on Saturday, I felt peace. On Saturday I was feeling silly coz I had realised the same but was blaming myself for being the problem in their relationship- a jigger, nsekere etc... I had beaten myself up about it on Saturday but with help from a beloved friend, I knew I on the brink of freedom.

So on Monday I realised this is what I wanted for her- to be happy. That smile on her face with him was enough to convince me. I decided to take a step of faith; to be out of her life for good. It is the proof of love I have for her. I want them to be happy.

Thank God that is dealt with.

Baseline:
1Co 13:4,5 Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud;
love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of wrongs;

9 comments:

Beloved said...

:-)
I'm glad for you Nev... takes alot to get there!

tumwijuke said...

Is it dealt with really? I hear you, but I don't HEAR you ...

mumakeith said...

Its great the way you dealt with it. Fresh beginning.

Bee said...

You saw her with someone else and you didn't cave? Wow. You are one strong person...

Unknown said...

@Tumwi, hopefully it is. I am at peace.

Thanks @beloved and @Mckeith

@Bee, sometimes we need to be strong to go through those hurdles.

Misstarii said...

Reaching that point of letting her go and caring for her happiness is huge. Its peace and freedom.
I love that verse.

Sleek said...

you are a hard chap man

lulu said...

tmwi... i am asking the same too... maybe you have settled in within ...

Unknown said...

@Tumwi,@Lulu It took long to get here, but I am here and I feel free!

@Sleek, seems I am.

@tricia Yeah, speaks well on my situation