Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Closing her chapter.

I went for a wedding on Saturday; the Church service. A friend of mine was getting married to a sweetheart. I love weddings- I make sense of them; I'm a freak for aesthetic value. So I prefer the Church service to the reception. I am not going to tell you how the service went, I want to touch on a number of points in today's post so won't have time for that.

Well, going to the wedding, I anticipated to see her coz she is a close friend of the bride nonetheless I was fine, no quaking. I was going to be G.

So church was going on when this graceful light skinned belle walked in in a short black evening dress. Don't worry, I didn't faint...lol. She still looked great. I only saw her from the back but she sat a small distance from me. Later on, I noticed the boyfriend was there with her and I thought, "How noble".

After service ended I greeted some friends I hadn't seen in a while which was great but didn't seem to see her. I didn't mind really, till I began walking to the stage to grab a taxi....Lonesomeness invites deep thought so I began thinking again about her and him. That Saturday I did think about her a whole lot.

However, Monday came. I had an appointment with a friend and as we talked about the biz, I saw her pic and his on a brochure and it struck me. This is what I wanted. I did not particularly want her back in my life, I just wanted to know she was happy. And seeing them here on the brochure as well as on Saturday, I felt peace. On Saturday I was feeling silly coz I had realised the same but was blaming myself for being the problem in their relationship- a jigger, nsekere etc... I had beaten myself up about it on Saturday but with help from a beloved friend, I knew I on the brink of freedom.

So on Monday I realised this is what I wanted for her- to be happy. That smile on her face with him was enough to convince me. I decided to take a step of faith; to be out of her life for good. It is the proof of love I have for her. I want them to be happy.

Thank God that is dealt with.

Baseline:
1Co 13:4,5 Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud;
love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of wrongs;
Reactions:

9 comments:

:-)
I'm glad for you Nev... takes alot to get there!

Is it dealt with really? I hear you, but I don't HEAR you ...

Its great the way you dealt with it. Fresh beginning.

You saw her with someone else and you didn't cave? Wow. You are one strong person...

@Tumwi, hopefully it is. I am at peace.

Thanks @beloved and @Mckeith

@Bee, sometimes we need to be strong to go through those hurdles.

Reaching that point of letting her go and caring for her happiness is huge. Its peace and freedom.
I love that verse.

tmwi... i am asking the same too... maybe you have settled in within ...

@Tumwi,@Lulu It took long to get here, but I am here and I feel free!

@Sleek, seems I am.

@tricia Yeah, speaks well on my situation