Thursday, June 30, 2011

Sometimes Girls Are Just ....

"It is not fair for one person to have that much power over another..." That is what somebody said regarding a boy/girl relationship. And yesterday I saw the truth in that statement. One of the few things that will make a man considerably weak and helpless and downright exposed, is his emotions for a woman.

"If you're a player out there sit your tail down and grow up..."

I am not writing from the view of a player, I am writing from the view of men who have discovered that the one worthwhile thing they can truly love is also the same thing that can make them truly abhor.

I do not know if I have the words to express what I want to express but, darn, sometimes girls just need to grow up.

There is an old tradition among women which goes along the lines of a guy doesn't love a woman who is "easy to get" and therefore meaning, never say yes to a guy the first time he asks you out. In other words, there is some unwritten rule that allows women to lead men on on the guise of proving if the guys really like them. So, they expect that the guy who doesn't take no for an answer really likes you, and the one who believes your no and moves on was just a joker.

I am not saying there is completely no truth in the above statement, however, over time, men are changing. After preaching the "no means no" gospel in the last century, women expect men not to practice what they have preached. No means no. Not wait.

I have met men who have taken the women at their word, honorable men who do not have time to engage their hearts in dangerous risk behaviour of maybes. They have received the no's albeit with a lot of heartbreak but have moved on, gone forward, left the women in their past.

So it is annoying when the same women come back and assault you with an unbelievable amount of attention trying to entice you back to what you have moved on from.

For some reason, men are taken to be beasts with hearts of steel. On the outside, maybe, but very few women know the thing a guy goes through to express his heart for a girl. A man is raised up to be strong, courageous, honorable and it seems to many men are more machine than human. That is not true.

The reason men seem to become machine is that they treasure their heart immensely and when one plays with it, the man, retrieves heart and guards it at whatever cost. Never wonder why crushes at school used to make men soft? That is a sacred part of a guy. Not saying it is not sacred for a woman too.

What I am saying is, girls need to grow up and stop thinking men are playthings you can remove from the closet whenever you feel like it.

A close friend shared with me how he was cruelly let down by a girl after almost a year of pursuit. She accepted the dates, received the gifts, as though everything was okay. Brother plots to make his true heart known and does so. Girl tells him she has heard and will get back to him as she has certain pressing things to do. Time passes and finally they meet. So, she decides to give him the answer, and the best way for her to do it was by saying, she has met someone she is more attracted to than him?!!!

Friend loses words, loses appetite, almost breaks down. His heart has been hit by a 2 ton boulder, and pressed against a 10 metre thick wall of concrete.

Well, if you don't like me like that, tell me so. Better yet, do not lead me on to think you may like me back like that. But what is worse is demeaning and devaluing a man by telling him there is a better guy you have met. That to me was cruel. Can easily make a man a player.

Another friend had a similar experience, he did not even drive home, he walked home. Grieved like he had lost a relative. The thing is , I do not think women take a man's pursuit in the same importance with which they treat their "in love" emotions. Want to break a man, (not a player), break his heart through a love for a woman.

You will know why Samson lost his hair and died a blind man.

Man can be wealthy, honorable, wise, but once you put a woman in the picture, all those things suddenly lose splendour. When a man loves a woman, believe me it is not a joke. I am not saying that means he deserves to be loved back just cause he loves seriously and solemnly.

I have a friend called Adler. She is a woman. She did not lead Sherlock on. From the moment she discovered he had feelings for her, she let him know she was not in the same mindset or "emotionset" and told him she would not lead him on but that they could be friends. Sher and Adler are one of the greatest examples of friendship I know. Why? There was mutual respect for each others feelings.

So, before you lead a guy on, girl, know that if you are joking about it, you may make a beast or a machine out of a man and so it is better to be wise enough and kind enough to let him know the truth early on before he gets over the moon.

Some people learn on the job, some people come already qualified. Whether you like a guy or maybe think you can learn to like him, why not be wise enough and let him know what is on the ground?

I think sometimes women/girls are just so selfish and cruel.

...does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 1 Cor 13:5

Friday, June 24, 2011

We are Hosea's Wife

I just spoke silence with the seeker next to me
She had a heart with hesitant, halting speech
That turned to mine and asked belligerently
"What do I live for?"

I see the scars of searches everywhere I go
From hearts to wars to literature to radio
There's a question like a shame no one will show
"What do I live for?"

We are Hosea's wife
We are squandering this life
Using people like ladders and words like knives

If we've eyes to see
If we've ears to hear
To find it in our hearts and mouths
The word that saves is near
Shed that shallow skin
Come and live again
Leave all you were before
To believe is to begin

There is truth in little corners of our lives
There are hints of it in songs and children's eyes
It's familiar, like an ancient lullaby
What do I live for?

We are Hosea's wife
We are squandering this life
Using bodies like money and truth like lies

We are more than dust
That means something
That means something
We are more than just
Blood and emotions
Inklings and notions
Atoms on oceans

By Brooke Fraser

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Why Grace?

It's not that people cannot work for it, it's just that people will always want to do more, will always want to prove something, will always want to have one more star, their name in lights, on the silver will always need approval for their efforts.

Men can attempt to do right but at one point the line between doing right and motive for doing right will be lost. Sooner than later, you won't be giving because it is the right thing to do but rather because you want to receive applause for giving the bigger amount. Didn't the pharisees blow their own trumpets before they gave alms?

Righteousness can not be attained through our works, because somewhere along the way, superlatives will come into play.

Adam levelled the ground, out of him reduces us all to failure. Which is why we need grace. Grace demands no superlatives. Grace will take the best or the worst, the cleanest or filthiest. The shortest or tallest. The wisest or stupidest.

No need to pull rope trying to prove I am better than you. His blood makes us all acceptable.

Forget your goodness, your wealth, your wisdom, there are earthly merits. When it comes to God, the only merit is grace and faith in the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

God bless.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

I am Your Everyday Academic -Emotional Christian

I am an Academic -Emotional Christian. I am far from the Spiritual, Faith part of this walk.

I am moved by the Word of God, yes. I am moved by the Word of God only to the point of saying "wow", or "amen" or "this is so true", or "My God". Sure it moves me but not to the point where I actually want to make a difference:Where I know it is true but will not take the effort to make a change.
I am moved by the word of God. I am moved by the word of God but only through television, and in the e-mail devotional, Oh yes even on radio broadcasts. I catch snacks instead of "man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God" I limit the effect of God's word by demeaning it's importance in my life. I never have time for meditation, for study, for prayer, but have enough time for facebook, tetris, cards and FIFA10... I know, I've heard guys saying this before, but it's just no longer appealing.

I am able to recite John 3:16 , Jeremiah 29:11, Philippians 4:6,7, 1 Cor 2:9 but never willing to go further to John 3:17, 18, 19 , 20; Jeremiah 29:11 onto 18 and 19; Philippians 4:8 and 9; 1 Cor 2:8. I prefer what is emotionally appealing.

I am emotionally living and not living by faith. I love to not judge, but am quiet on correcting and discipline. I am quick to be "inclusive" at the expense of holiness and justice.

I am going to be held accountable for loving someone so right yet not enough to lead them to the cross. I think I will hurt their feelings by telling them God does not approve of how they live their life. I am scared of being called unloving, politically incorrect, unfeeling, inhuman, selfish, close-minded if I tell it like it is.

I am glad when I hear feel-good Christian music but when it gets preachy, I lower the volume. I dance at God is enough-Lecrae but slightly turn away when they play After the music stops by the same man. I am wary of reproof but rejoice at encouragement.

Yeah I love the Lord, I know he understands my addiction, my passion, my habit. I guess if He saw fit since He is sovereign to give me this "thorn", then He will take it away Himself. I am okay with how I am. I won't be bothered to grow in discipline after all He can take it away, His grace is sufficient. I have relegated the need to grow to the need to be accepted, the need to feel okay

I am academic, I know what's in the Bible, and I am emotional, I love to feel good inside. But going further addressing the spiritual?

12 For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the first principles of the oracles of God; and you have come to need milk and not solid food. 13 For everyone who partakes only of milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, for he is a babe. 14 But solid food belongs to those who are of full age, that is, those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil. Hebrews 5. NKJV

John 6:63 It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing. The words that I speak to you are spirit, and they are life. NKJV

6 For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. Romans 8. NKJV

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Find me

When it rains, let is wash
For my sins are upto my neck,
Regret down to my toes
Water, crystal clear, crystal clean
Wash away my sorrow.

When I let my eyes rove to the left ,
To the right;
Where is my shield, where is my name
Floating on this field creaking crumbling, very weak
Rain from above, wash away, wash away?

In a frenzy of uncertainty,
In a fury of doubt,
Ageless grace won't you find me
Direct me in your stream,
Carry me with your flow?

I don't know, I am scared
Sort of flipping, very pale,
What was clearing, some blurs more
I hate these shades,
Give me grace, no greys.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Risk Management

Was reading up about risk management, trying to understand more about risk in business ventures. In short, it involves identifying the risk, assessing it and prioritising it. Risk is in simple terms an uncertainty of an objective- your plans could succeed or fail. There is no definite way to predict to the highest correctness whether the outcome of your actions will be a success and not a failure.

Somethings are more risky than others because of the value of loss involved. Chances are if you bet on Manchester United winning in a Champions' League Final against Barcelona FC, you will lose your money. Why? Manchester are not half as good as the Catalans. In such cases, the skill is measurable.

What about when it comes to unmeasurables, for example, a person's will?

In Economics, one of the reasons people buy yet they do not necessarily need to is because despite the measurable variables, humans are oft illogical and will sometimes be led by their hearts and not their heads.

Between the heart and mind, what would I choose? Tough decision, out of the heart the issues of life flow but with a dead mind, we make all the wrong decisions.

When it comes to a person's will and their emotions, risk management becomes impossible. No way to determine an outcome, no previous data, nothing at all. Which is why we have this thing called hope. Hope is a nice little animal that sees the glass as always half full. There is always something good to look forward to in its books. Our hearts for some reason decide to hope, when they do not, they draw back.

The WORD lets us know that faith is the substance of things hoped for. Faith without hope isn't faith. There needs to be a glass half full seen before one can believe it will be.

So, when our happiness depends on unclear circumstances, or a person's choice, we are left with hope, not even faith, just hope. For a man's will is theirs, and unless illegally bent by mind control, it is not subject to anyone else.

Can hope be perfected? So that despite the outcome, a man's heart fails not? I believe it can be.

Rom 5:5 And hope does not make us ashamed, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit given to us.

Risk management when dealing with free will? Hope. Especially when the love of God has been poured out in the heart through God's Holy Spirit. May there be comfort, refuge and restoration when things go bad, even when you hoped they would not. With these, hope and love, you can be like Joseph who endured his brothers' ostracism, prison, betrayal but still forgave.

You can be like David who though could have killed his enemy, turned from the evil act or above all, be like Emmanuel who forgave his assailants in the act of murdering him.

Hope you make sense of this.

Monday, June 06, 2011

This is just for you.

Strange but Sweet Love.

Laughter, smiles, voice
When all are yours,
Leave me utterly no choice
But to ask for more.

More time to hear, feel, love, look
"Don't go yet"
Fairy tale book;
Sweets, might be flavoured fate.

Elixir of love?
Fuel of longing?
It is all I have
And I keep on hoping.

I could start now,
To open and fill these cherry pages,
But we're both asking how
Yet somehow the double-tip pen forward-edges.

Subtle, but strangely imposing
It stays like good wine in a cellar.
Two boats on a sea sailing,
You and I, dreams gone stellar.

Isn't it strange yet sweet, love?