Lions and Liars

Bazanye- you like rap or is it hip hop?. I'm giving you what I think is the best Sho Baraka-[mercy on me] on the Lions and Liars album.

This is a message to me, I can relate and I think many of us can. Immerse yourselves.

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Hook
(Chinua Hawk)
Lord, Lord you know I tried/
When I should have been strong I cried/
When I should have helped I walked on by/
When I should have told the truth I straight up lied/
I know your love has set me free/
But I keep putting you back on that tree/
Oh Lord, Have your mercy on me/
Loving father put your grace on me, on me/

2nd thru 4th Chorus addition
Put your Grace on me, on me (repeat 3x)
Loving Father
Put your Mercy on me, on me (repeat 3x)
Loving Father Put you Mercy on me, on me

Verse 1
Tre's nerves are bubbling, juggling jobs, avoid hustling/
Hard trusting in God- because he's struggling/
TV's throwing lust at him, Corner boys punking him/
Wife wants to fuss with him, LORD keep touching him/
He might return to street life, But he'll fight will all he can/
Coz if they test him again, He would hate to have kill a man/
The pressure he can't handle it, he's lost his ways to channel it/
He might Black out, Then he ends up back in anger management/
His common problem- is his values aren't- matching his wallet/
He's praying but still jobless, his faith used to keep him honest/
His visions of bad decisions are void of the godly wisdom/
So this one bad decision will probably lead him to prison/
So a week from now, He'll be at a Bank in town/
he'll be yelling get down, with some other clowns, waving a gun around/
He'll succeed ducking the cops and leaving with the profits/
But he'll have problems dodging all the guilt that's working on his conscious/

Verse 2
Jane's feeling the pain, like razors are in her vein/
Last year the cancer came, and now her life has changed/
Chemo and pain killers, the disdain's gettin realer/
Her Hope's becoming thinner, from all the news they give her/
She taking the news with caution, coz she knows the Lord is awesome/
But often she pauses, of the losses and of what death could cost us/
Is it worth fighting she nauseous, plus the hospital charges/
She heard there's a light in the tunnel but all she sees is Darkness/
No one is feeling her burden, they just keep giving her sermons/
If they listened with more discernment, they could tell that she's hurting/
Her speech is an illusion, she's scared of the end conclusion/
If she shares her doubt- then she fears her image may be ruined/
Shes holds her fears in, tears in, She'll be dead by years end/
Shes not thinking through how God forgives sins/
Until then her nights are long, and she's faking strong/
In the corner of her home, This will be her song, sing /

Verse 3
How often we go thru motions, of up and down rollercoasting/
Scared to admit were hurting, with nervous thoughts of perversion/
This culture we've built is perfect, were saying His death was worthless/
We're Not concerned with His worship as along we do our churchin/
Were decorating our person, just to continue lies/
Our shortcomings we hide, with a shallow disguise/
To prove we got it together, to make it seem like were better/
Than friends, family whoever, we take some extreme measures/
We have a desire to add, to the grace that we have/
We're never content with our lives, we operate with pride/
We hate to seem dependent, but that's the way that He intended/
Humans made in His image, built to live in the tension/
Learn His wisdom, were distant , love we didn't deserve it/
We confess that we're worthless, then we break our backs to earn it/
Without You I'm, helpless and weak, my existence is bleak/
I refuse to proceed without Your grace and mercy on me/

Routine Rejection and Switchfoot

My eyes wide open, I've got my eyes wide open, I've been keeping my hopes unbroken....

Those are words from Switchfoot's Your Love Is A Song. Ever since I got their album [Hello Hurricane], I have been feeding on it. I personally believe there is no greater rock band in the world than Switchfoot. The lyrics and clever instruments always gets me whether I am down or up or on the way up.

In a past life I think I was in Switchfoot. Anyway, there are times when the words they speak directly touch my circumstances and give me reason to keep trusting [GOD] and keep pushing forward.

"I've been keeping my hopes unbroken."

You know how easy it is to throw your hopes to the wind when things keep falling apart? It is this easy. Repetitive unsuccessful attempts have a way of drying up a man's resolve and making him soulless. There's a way such situations harden the heart. There's this song called Ononsonyiwa by Jamal which talks of how his behaviour has been affected by past hurts in love.

Naturally, that should be the case; hope keeps fading. However Switchfoot and I agree, it is always noble to "keep your hopes unbroken", regardless how many failures or how long it takes for you to see something come alive!

As a matter of fact, even the Apprentice according to his daughter advises, Don’t take no for an answer and Be annoyingly persistent when you want something.

Keep your hopes unbroken. No matter how many rejection letters you receive, no matter how many times girls say no to you, no matter, no matter, no matter.....


Hello hurricane, you're not enough
Hello hurricane, you can't silence my love
I've got doors and windows boarded up
All your dead end fury is not enough
You can't silence my love, my love

What do you usually do when storms come? Cower? Hide? Run? Scream? Some times in life, challenges befall us like hurricanes and the very core of our soul comes to a point of despair.

Loss? Rejection? Failure? etc? How do you prepare to face life's hurricanes? Love. Love at the core. Consider Rom 8:35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? Rom 8:39 nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

There is a another stanza that rocks concerning this same thing:

Every thing I have I count as loss
Everything I have is stripped away
Before I started building I counted up these costs
There's nothing left for you to take away

Contentment. Faith. Purpose. If you know you have purpose, and you live it with faith, nothing can stop you because you find contentment in the perfect power of God who is able to do all things. These Switchfoot guys know how to share the Word. I love it so much.

Hallelujah, every breath is a second chance, yeah

Yes, another Switchfoot line. Every breath is a second chance. Another chance to dust yourself and keep pursuing God, keep pursuing life, keep pursuing peace, keep pursuing truth, keep pursuing love.

In my life, one can say I have gone through routine rejection all my life. Normally the response should be negative, you know, the things you hear in love songs about how people have given up on love, or are going to break hearts etc, such stupid stuff.

I am not saying there is no pain involved, there is pain. That pain pains! LOL. However, it helps to think, put things in perspective, trust God and just know all things work for the good of those who love the Lord.

Whoah!! You are reading this and you do not know the LORD? Eph 2:8 For by grace you are saved through faith, and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God,
Eph 2:9 not of works, lest anyone should boast. Just come. Forget trying to earn salvation, it is impossible. Just do the 3:16, believe in Christ Jesus and start your journey.

Well, it is only appropriate I finish with Switchfoot,

And I fall in love
With the ones that run me through
When all along all I need is you

nowplaying: Always [Switchfoot]

Saying Goodbye for Good.

She never took her eyes off him the entire time the vows were being made. Her big round eyes. She stared deep into his eyes, ultimately showing certainty of what she was doing.

There are things in life which when they happen, momentarily challenge your sanity. July meant my time was up and that all hope was lost and that if I had any hope, I better relinquish it.

There's something about an ex getting married that touches you at the base. You may even be friends with her, not beefing with her but the fact that she is getting married rubs you the wrong way.

I will be honest. I had mixed emotions. On the one part I was happy for her, why? God had totally transformed her. I remember back when we were at Bible Study together and she used to say she never wanted to get married. I must admit I hoped that sort of thinking did not persist [for my own sake of course]. So seeing her make those vows to that man to me was God.

On the other hand, I was angry, selfish, dejected. I felt cheated, I felt like I had watered the plant and pruned it well only for someone else to eat the fruit. I know- I was being vain, there are the sowers and reapers and both must rejoice. However in my heart I was like it was 3 years of Nevonic presence in her life that brought about that change snd what were my gains?

I know- this is selfish but let me get it off my chest. I invited her to Church...the place she would grow and even find a husband and when I left she got angry. I felt I deserved more but heck life is not fair.

I approached to take the gift [in Church], and when she saw me she said " My God you made it!!". Yes, at one time we were inseparable and if she had invited me there would be no doubt I would be there. However, we grow up, we get exposed to Politics. Politics; she invited me, hoping I would make it but knowing I had an ego and may avoid it. However, she was my friend first. I owed her that. Therefore, I showed up; her acknowledging it made the Church feel a little warmer somehow.

I watched as she gave herself away, as she officially became his. As all prayer requests tumbled and broke, all hope was lost etc. . . Well not really. She was gone before she was married. I knew it was over at one point. However there's that thing about a girl you love well, when she goes, she never really goes. So now maybe the curtains are closed and I can focus on my hiking and adventuring business.

This is it. Freedom.

I ask myself at this point: LORD, did I learn the lesson you were teaching me all this while?

nowplaying : This is your life [Switchfoot]

Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead, yesterday is a promise that you've broken; Don't close your eyes this is your life, and today is all you got now, and today is all you'll ever have....

Forward we move [Kwame Nkrumah]

The BHH

These were his exact words that snake-hissy tongue; mbu "Ze Be. etcH. etcH, it is upon us. Vat shall ve do? Today's theme is 'how to have a local accent but still be sexy'. come with ur points written down, and earn points"

Sir, who promised these points, I did not see them at all. Neither did we at anyone point talk about local sexy accents.

At this rate, BHH as a name is becoming meaningless. Moreso, there are many different social networking religions; some believe that one liners are the way to go therefore twitter, others [Sleek] simply cannot bottle up all the awesomeness of literal grandeur in one sentence so prefer to blog. Others, like Baz are about effect-whatever does it best, he believes and practices. Others are just down right addicted to facebook. Others are loyalists-blogger or die baby!

I am not supposed to do this review because I agreed with Dorene that since she knew everyone's name and I was well, quick to forget, she would do it. 24 hrs later she has sat on her duties that shameless sweet girl of the dimples.

Charlene, Darlene. What are the odds of having people at BHH with rhyming names moreover in alphabetical order? C-D. Don't ask me though, I can't tell you but we had Charlene and Darlene in the same space on Thursday night. However, I do not know if their paths crossed. By the way, Dee, you last blogged in March!!!! A whole you?!


I got at Mateos thinking I was early. The security man waved his metal detector upon my sides, under the arms and so forth. No, he did not touch me. But he took my water, my mineral water mbu we they had water inside. Can you imagine, I left my half empty mineral water bottle with the guard because they had mineral water inside?

I finally got to see Dorene's hair in real life 3D without the goggles. It feels like hair actually. Thought it felt like something cooler, no offence miss. I said Dorene because my cousin says she's no longer called Antipop...What was the explanation for the name dropping?

Jason is a great poet, but a blogger? I did not know. For many of you who do not know this dude, he is a rebel. Remember George Bernard Shaw anyone? The reason Americans spell colour as color and finalise as finalize. This dude is a rebel like that: What are sentence caps to him? Does he even know what full stops do in poetry? He's a rebel.

Spartacuss is growing bigger. I wonder what spinach he is eating that I may eat some too. Ooooh, in fact him and Sleek seem to go to the same gym. Spartacuss was around for a short time but I noticed that after I had gone home.

Diana, on the other hand was around for a short time, but I noticed her in the act of exiting the premises in the company of a one mogul whose name I may not mention in this my blog space. Could have been Baz, or DK, I wish it were me.

Anyway, Youngafrican is a Sneakerhead. She had on a cool pair of sneakers which by some computer demon I have failed to show here. Click on this link to see what I mean-http://thegloss.com/files/2008/07/converse-metal-backstage-hi-top-sneakers.jpg. Funky stuff.


Oh, had forgotten, in African tradition MarkBulamu is my uncle because he and my mom share a tribe. That makes it legit for me to call Normzo, uncle. So uncle Normzo, next time I need to go to Muyenga, can I borrow your car? Tehehe.

Johnny my man, mbu had a fever. So initially, his drink of choice was a cold Coca Cola. He was in fact also putting on a sweater. However, during the course of the evening some miracle chanced upon him and he ended up taking a "cool" Nile Gold. I wonder whether it was the only one, however, being in the company of Normzo and Mark, peer pressure may have worked wonders. Later, these guys were joined by Carsozy to start their day at Mateos. By the way, Carsozy, where had you gone off to man? A year in absence.

Talking of miracles, that lady who always looks HOT!! in red, I mean who else, Heaven of the Sqoop, said she had been at Free Thinkers night [insert shudder here]. And whoever she told indeed initially shuddered, not a shudder of disgust but one of betrayal! Those people are enemies!! Like the Triads and Yakuza! How could she?

Anyhow, she did. Good thing though is she was not converted...hehe [Sleek would never had approved anyway].

So my cousin, Safyre [please remember that name Dorene] was there. In fact, he arrived in the company of three ladies, two of whom disappeared shortly after they entered the premises.

Lulu succumbed to the pull of BHH and showed up looking corporate as usual. Which reminds me, where does Basix be these days? Streetsider never loses a step with style. In another world, he was the famous black rockstar from Uganda. Last time I remember, Street had quit blogging but guess he's back.

However, I think my greatest joy was in seeing Nalongo. The one of the twins. Chanel. Mama Baby. I think she be so blessed. I mean twins. Boy and girl, wow! Notwithstanding, I had forgotten how Chanel looked and then she went right on and embarrassed me by saying she knew who I was. Anyway, that was sorted. Then there was this Mwirigi [Paul] who apparently knew almost everyone at BHH albeit not being a blogger.

Ivan has not yet played God of War 3. I had to check.

Mark Keith. McKeith, Baz, Safyre with Heaven attempted to mock me because I was unknown to Lady Sinister, the in your face girl with the Fro'. On the contrary, she has heard of Nev, and Rev and tells me she checks my blog but finds narra. Forgive me for being so famous [vanity vanity]. Rev....aha. All I know is he was busy, so could not make it.


I wonder what Guinness tastes like. No, I do not wonder. I wonder why most ladies at BHH were fascinated with Guinness. All I could see around were black bottles of that 250 year old brew. Aha. Oh, save for the fact that McKeith and Safyre wanted Safe Sex on the Beach...I didn't know what that was..honest but since Safyre wanted to drink it, should not have been alcoholic and indeed it isn't. Unfortunately for the fans of the Mateos cocktails, there was no buy one get one free this time.

This is the point I apologise to those whose names I forgot or did not bother to find out because I was either shy or too shy. [The two/three ladies seated near me/opposite?] Dorene should have done this recap. She usually remembers all names, except my cousin's name.

I had fun at BHH. The turn out was great. Oh, and you know how when you go to Church every Sunday it encourages you to live a Christian life of faith, in the same way, BHH revives the desire to blog, which I am hereby doing.

Charlene, your name is not so hard to pronounce by the way, and I did not know rum was sold in Mateos. I thought it was a sea affair.

Oh, a friend of mine made a cameo albeit unnoticed, Ronnie, a funny guy I have known for 5 years now. Maybe he will soon become a blogger too.

Dorene, I am waiting for your version 2.0 BHH review.

I'm out.

Nev.

Steel

Right now I feel like she is this near, kindred soul, I actually feel her pulsating under my skin. My cadence has changed and my head follows suit. Wish I could scream like she does. Wish I could shout like she does. Wish I could be her, but me. I am drawn. She brings me to tears. She knows how cold a heart can feel. She is here right now, alone with me in my solace, in the cold warmth. Sing some more for me.

Umbrella

I was trying to get the perfect words,
An umbrella of light to place in your hands
For you to place above your head,
So the rain of pain wouldn't make you wet.

But how would I know lest you told me so,
That they were delightful and made you glow?
So I decided to give what I thought was best;
Something that I thought would leave you blessed.

So I'm saying, when you smile, I will smile with you;
And when you cry, I will be strong for you;
When pain overwhelms, I will pray for you;
When sorrow sheds your heart, I will comfort you...

With the love that God has placed in my heart;
With the courage that God has put in my soul;
With the hope that tomorrow is a better day,
And the faith that God is here even today.

For Double A, :) again.

In the valley.

It was red hot coals
Fiery water falls,
Thorns under my feet,
Nails in my bones.
Drilling in my head,
Banging in my joints,
Rain from my skin,
Roars in my voice.

~Dearest Miswa~

Hi,

No need to be official,
Let me italicise:
hii ni ukweli,
No need to close my eyes.

I keep my eyes open
But sometimes they've lied,
Often I've missed the pearl
Coz I saw just the shell.

Purple lilac at first glance
A surge of emotions,
You set my feet to dance
Like the waves of the ocean.

But your purity and love
Rushed over me,
And soon became
The white lilac I now see.

You're a friend and an ear,
A shoulder for me to lean
Let me give you these words-
Goodness, may they glean.

Hii ni ukweli
My heart wants to give,
huu urafiki ni wa ukweli
These words I do give.

Growing

I have a feeling that I might have exchanged skills over the past few months. Why is it much harder to write a post than design a graphic? Anyway, given that much of my writing is deeply connected to my emotional, spiritual and mental state, I think this is witness that the waves present before are really declining.

A note to the past era of girls.

It is sad that when I was willing, you were not, when I was ready, you were tired, when I was in love, you had resentment. It is sad that now you're on the road and I'm on the mountain, that you yearn for flowers yet I am a garden.

Phase out. Gone. I am a stage in life that you missed. I am not coming back.

You know what freedom is? Looking at you and not even twitching. So, --> we move as Nkrumah my man said. I guess we'll be neighbours very soon.

Love you? Yes, I do.

Thank God I am growing.

Love song

I made the heavens farther than the eye can see
Placed the stars in the sky, made the moon shine brightly
Woke you up with the sun shining through your window
Sing you a serenade every time the wind blows

See the earth in all of it's beauty
It all came from Me
Take the time to look above
And you'll know, you can't sing about love
Without singin' bout me

Singin' bout Me
Without singin' bout Me

I made the clouds, even the air you breathe
Made you in My image, so that you can be like Me
My love is sweet, more to make you happy
Such joy and peace, wanna give you all of Me
It's the reason why you smile
It makes livin' all worth while
It would bring tears to your eyes

So how you gon' sing about love, without singin' 'bout Me?

Canton Jones

It's time to stand

Eph 5:8 For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord; walk as children of light

What good is a man whose mind is like a river, tossed too and fro by the wind? He is the man, whose feet are not standing on sure ground. He tries to walk on the water [it's a story he heard]; he is the man swayed to and fro by the winds of the world

If you could plant your roots by the river side, that they would grow deep into the nutritious ground, maybe when the winds pull you to their wiles, this time you will stay upright, and not bend to their lies.

Every new thought is a piece in the jigsaw of purpose. Who I am? Why I am here? And why did I have to go through this? And they sway him wherever they go...

[Lookin for love in all the wrong places just to find someone who can erase the hurt and if u could you'd get a potion- the love of God goes deeper than an ocean. lookin for love u know that i can show you cus' what I've found goes on and on and on and u never have to worry about it being gone] ...

Who knows where the hurt came from? The pain? Why is the man always trying to fill a gap? Maybe it explains his constant sway. Grasping at empty words, empty phrases; smoke, just vapour, holding onto nothingness. Laws and regulations give him newer questions, newer conflicts, so the jigsaw only gets complicated.

Time to stand man. Time to stand firm. Time to let go of the milk, leave momma's worn out breasts. It's time man; time to eat meat, time to let the things of the children go. It is time, to be man.

Baseline:Eph 6:11,13 Put on the whole armor of God so that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. Therefore take to yourselves the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

Weekend wrap.

Friday 1400hrs. I receive a call from client saying I need to go meet him. I had no plans of going back to town having been there in the morning and having seen a client who attempted to get my services at 70k. [Let me not confuse you-the two clients are different]. For purposes of clarity let me call the 70k dude [grossnjawulo]. I am referred to him by a friend and told that he needs a website. So I go to meet him, I am so on time and he is so late, I actually got to his place of work 30 minutes before he did.

So [grossnjawulo] has been given an assignment to work on getting a website for one NGO up and running. He tells me he has an idea of how he wants it to appear and shows me a number of [lacklustre] websites he is getting ideas from. He inquires about hosting and I refer him to a very good hosting website and will cost him around 130,000/-. So after that is finished we proceed to talk about design fees. I tell him my [design fee] and brother man says that it is too much! He tells me he was thinking of spending 200,000 in total.

200,000/- in total.

I hope he made a mistake and tell him that would be enough for hosting. He says, it includes design fees! He begins to convince me how things will get better when the site is up and running and also says that since he thought he was dealing with an individual designer not a company, he would not be charged [that much]! Inside, I am laughing hilariously.

[Grossnjawulo] is obviously trying to make a cut, and he wants to squeeze the designer to get his cut. I would like to think the NGO has particular funds set aside for website and that the fees are standard. What I did not tell the brother was that a company could have charged him many times what I was charging him but the laughter inside jammed. So [grossnjawulo] wanted to pay me 70k for designing a website. I left with his number promising to get back to him, which reminds me, I did not move with his business card so guess the response will delay.

What do people think we are anyway? Charitable organisations?

So the call at 1400hrs. Client2, let us call him [grossnagging]. He had promised some sort of payment by end of the week, so when I get his phone call I am excited because he is telling me to go over.

By now I am excited, almost forgetting [grossnjawulo]'s silly deal. When I get there, [grossnagging] calls his business partner reminding him that everyone was present. I could only assume this was pay day because there were other people expecting dimes or that's what I thought at least.

When he comes, we are told to go and so it seems they are looking for a hideout to distribute dimes to the guys. So we get to one, he orders sodas and then guess what happens, files come out and the words -let us start the meeting- sound. We start, talk about the work we're doing, challenges and stuff, which includes payment. As we talk on, I am waiting for the dude to announce that our dimes are now here; however, I wait in vain, as we are promised nothing is coming soon.

Frustrated? Yes. Depressed? No. I am looking forward to the weekend and seems now money supply has been cut. The PIFF party looks hazy for now. However, there is some light- promise of IronMan2 Saturday! All I need is half the amount.

Saturday comes,fast forward----->>>>> 7pm-9pm. Pure FUN!!! Jon Favreau, merci beaucoup.

Sunday's rain, did a good job in demotivating me from going to Daddy's house however, I needed to go for the BASIC Family fellowship.
aLL, I can say is, that family is a blessing. Y'all can come visit us next time- June 6th. You will have a good time.

I have a million tasks to complete before tomorrow, I have not half started on any but after this, I am going to. Talking about clients, employers and employees, today's baseline is for you to be motivated to work.

BASELINE: Ephesians 6:5-8
Slaves, be obedient to those who are your earthly masters, with fear and trembling,in singleness of heart, as to Christ; not in the way of eye-service, as men-pleasers, but as servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, rendering service with a goodwill as to the Lord, and not to men, knowing that whatever good anyone does, he will receive the same again from the Lord, whether he is a slave or free. [RSV]

Sense and sensibility.

First, that is a book I have never read but whose title I have read...whatever proceeds from here forthwith may have no connection whatsoever to that said book title.

Since my life is not unusual any more; meaning, there is nothing out of the ordinary happening in my life-wait is this a fly? ! The thing has just gone under my monitor, it looks like it is inspecting ...whoah!! Fly!! Get outta my face! Fly, please?! This is not your space. Psshhhh!! Little winged ....

What was I saying? Oh yes, my quotidian life. Forget the fly interrupting my peaceful morning, that is an anomaly.Anyway, I was just about to tell you that my life is steadying out, the ups and downs are fading out. Drama just got evicted. In fact, safyre is opining mbu even the Mr nice guy died, mbu he may even have died a quick and painless death; whether it is true remains to be seen...

Ah! C'mon, just when I am getting into blog zone! Errands!

I will come back.

No one talks about BHH anymore...and love gone bad

and do you know why? It is because all the talking happens on twitter these days. What happened to the rave reviews of over 40 comments on the reports of BHH? And days building up to the excitement as well...from the King's site to the Basix, the Antipop, the Innocent etc... And as if that is not enough, formerly regular bloggers are not regular at their posts but anyway let me speak for myself.

I went to BHH, albeit arriving fashionably. Was not really my fault, I was with Safyre who convinced me that BHH had moved to Centenary gardens. We took our time, actually walked there after failing to successfully get a boda guy to take the two of us at 1.5k, but that is not important because we eventually got to Mateos.

Rhino, MarkBulamu of Normzo, Normzo, Johnny, Darlene, Baz, the King, Diana, Streetsider, SleekandWild, Heaven, (the damsel whose name I have failed to pronounce, in spects), (the other damsel seated next to Rhino), Ole,Spartacuss, Lulu (and her friend), Antipop, Ivan,Safyre, have I forgotten anyone?

Surprisingly Rev did not turn up, neither did Detamble. The Risingpage as usual did not make it.

It was a good crowd though conversations were less general.

Now that I have told you a bit about the BHH, maybe I shall repent of my blogcks and be a good blogger again starting with venting.

Have you ever felt scattered? Like you have bits and pieces of you all around the place? I do,it's that thing about letting go and moving on- reaching a point and discovering you gave a good part of yourself away to temporal insatiable things. It bugs. It's like learning an ex is getting married, or has a new boyfriend or is hanging out with a hot guy. Or learning that you put your cards on the wrong horse. It sucks.

It's when you learn you have been futile in your thinking and have trusted man, when you learn the world is no Neverland, that it is a brutal Spartan war field, where there are no rules. When you learn that truly people (myself included) are liars, pretenders, murderers and heartless, that people are selfish and think of themselves above all.

It is sad yet not without redemption. Forgiveness is one of the toughest things in life- letting go, saying it is okay and truly meaning it. It takes God, He alone is the author of love, and forgiveness. If God can do it, and I [Col 1:12 Giving thanks unto the Father, which hath made us meet to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in light:
Col 1:13 Who hath delivered us from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the kingdom of his dear Son: ] having been transferred into His light, then I know I am empowered to.

Those sucker punches, like when everyone else knows your ex is getting married and you know nothing, need not hurt anymore. Ha! You think it is easy? No, it is not. It takes courage and faith, it takes God's grace, it takes committment to be healed. That courage and faith that pushes through the crowd and touches the hem; that grace that after seeing you lowered through a roof says your sins are forgiven, you are well; that committment that shouts out in the crowds and says Son of Man heal me when everyone else tries to push you away.

You see, originally, I had come to vent but God has His ways. And anyway, God makes everything beautiful in its own time [Ecc 3:11 He has made everything beautiful in its time]; He cares more than anyone does-that love is the most important, and the one that needs to be grown most.

Baseline: Eph 3:17-19 that Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth and length and depth and height, and to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge, that you might be filled with all the fullness of God.

Message from William “The Ambassador” Branch

Message from William “The Ambassador” Branch

Days gone by

A brief recap.

Hey, this year blogging and me have been at odds but I always make time to put up something especially when my soul has been lifted.

There have been awesome days this year, far from the days at the beginning of the year which were very trying if not strenuous. By God’s grace I have been given joy, hope and contentment in many areas in my life.

There are days in my life my one mission was to not be single and even though I tried, that was a mission impossible. I have always had good female friends, as in, people I am very close to. I am a sensitive man, :-p, so I find relating to ladies easy.

This year, God blessed my life with a wonderful new friend, yes a lady, and I got nothing but love. You know how at times you sense something happening but then you diffuse it? Long story. Me and this friend of mine decided to do a tour of Muyenga on Easter weekend. I have no car, she loves to walk so naturally we walked that day.

We met up in Kabz, then walked up the hill, first went to the tank hill, looking at awesome looking houses as well as peeping into unfinished mansions and stuff. We then got a very awesome view of the city. We could see Bugolobi, Luzira, Kla,….wow!! Then went to another spot where we could see Bunga, Gaba, Kansanga and again it was a whoah!!
From there we walked back down to the main road then to Caffe Roma where we met a very interesting waiter called Norman. Very assertive man, whose words sounded like instructions! Well, later on he turned out nicer than we thought. We ordered and ate and had our tummy’s expand. At this point we almost fell asleep but took in some sodas.

We talked till like 9pm then walked back to Kabz. While there grabbed ice cream before she had to go.

I remember because I rarely am that peaceful and contented.

I diffused my ‘other’ thoughts and now, I feel this friendship is better than anything else for now. I am enjoying it a lot.

Now, yesterday was another day at Daddy’s place. I have been so rare there these days but when I went, He welcomed me and gave me such a wonderful word; I left so excited- that excitement when soul agrees with spirit….ayayayya…awesome.

I met her briefly and shared the word with her… I was so excited, she said she had never ever seen me that excited before. Wow. I pushed her to where she got a taxi and then got myself a meal and headed to Kisaasi for a BASIC Family fellowship.
The reason I love those guys is that they are filled with God’s love, and joy. Around them, how do tears start to roll? We were there sharing how we’d been, what our plans are and stuff like that and I was so excited about the kinship. I bless God, for He is our sustenance. He has kept BASIC going and I believe He will lift us to greater heights as well as inspire us to do greater good.

I am actively involved in planning for a dinner and I am so excited about it…only thing is, I need a famous person to come and give us some entertainment but I have no dime for them.. are you one, volunteer, please?

The baseline is to remind us Christ will not make sense to the world unless He removes the veil from their eyes. So, may we be given His grace to speak regardless how foolish we sound.

Baseline:
For the preaching of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us which are saved it is the power of God. (1 Corinthians 1:18)

The Tin Man's Curse

Pain. An eternal theme, can be expressed in many ways, but with all the pain we can feel, isn't it the pain in the soul that hurts the most? Here, a possible first of a best seller from a friend...enjoy.

Sweet webs of sleep laced my eyes shut, for a minute i felt the numbness ease away. I dreamt of beauty, the boy in blue and the girl with pink ribbons in her hair, hand in hand they leaped with joy, oblivious to the world at large. As I wept, I did so one last time. The rain fell hard on me and yes this is what I wanted, I told myself,to be drenched, some how cleansed of all, unable to feel all. So I shut my eyes as it rained harder. Lying there still, I grew cold, icy solid.

When I woke up I felt strange, light, almost elated!! However, was this what I wanted? Was all gone? I sat up trying to adjust to this new body. As I stretched out my hands, the metallic projections startled me at first, but then it dawned on me, I had indeed been transformed, I was all shiny metal, the rain had washed the flesh away. Tapping my chest gently, all that echoed back was the hollow emptiness; that wretched thing had gone too, vanished like the noon day breeze, now I could function, I could live, shining metal and all.

Days weaved into nights. I saw the birds singing by day but I could not hear their music; I gasped for air, but only to survive, never really breathing freshness. By night, the fireflies glowed, but I was not warmed. Then one day as I sat there pondering, a beautiful orchid began to bloom right before my eyes. I looked but I could not enjoy its scent; I tried to touch it but I could not. With its radiance it beamed, beckoning me on, but I was too afraid. I got up, took in all its beauty and ran. Why couldn't I stay? Why did I have to go? Why didn't I know of its beautiful fragrance? I'll tell you why. I have the Tin man's curse. I have no heart.


Azure C.K

(The Orchid's response.....next post.)

This one thing I hold onto...

Before it's too late. I will keep coming Lord, but what if one day it's too late?

14Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens,^e Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. 15For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. 16Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. (Heb 4:14-16)



So I keep coming, the only thing I hold onto is promise that you will see me, that in fact you will not see me, that you will see Jesus, the High Priest. I keep coming, LORD. I have nowhere else to go. If you will not accept me, then I am finished. D.A.M.N.E.D. So I keep coming Lord, my hope is in those words- approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that i may receive mercy and find grace to help me in my time of need.

That, is my lifeline. My sanity.

...So, the prank caller, and etc

She must have laughed her self silly, to think that a whole Nevender failed to deduce it was she playin the prank... Aha. This time she got me.

Just before I said good night two days ago, she said "good night Nev,"...and I was like, what did you call me? "Nev"... Now, you must understand, I gave her full doubt benefits, even those of not pursuing clues. So I was like okay, and she laughed. I said goodnight, not really thinking that it could have been her.

Last night I asked, "Do you any of your friends have my number?"

She laughed again- that laugh that gives one away but still I had given her so much benefits of doubt that she had to nudge me and say " It was me, okay?"

Nev:What??!! Hahaha...You played the prank?
Prank caller:Yes.
Nev:That wasn't you on the phone.
Prank caller:It was my relative who called.
Nev:Okay
Prank caller:Yeah, did not want to keep you in suspense any more
Nev:I wasn't in suspense, it was just funny, was wondering who it was
Prank caller:I can't believe you failed to figure it out
Nev:Why
Prank caller:Coz, it should have been obvious. I was expecting you to call me and say, nice one..
Nev: I knew it was a prank. There are no doctor love shows at 7:22pm.
Prank caller: But it was funny. She (Miss Jackson) said you sounded amazed that they knew your name.
Nev: Like I said, not many call me Nev.
Prank caller: It would have been better if the caller ID hadn't shown, haha.
Nev: Hmmm... you liked it.
Prank caller: Yes, haha


...and a whole yada yada..


So, she keeps upsetting the balance of power this one. Keeps revealing new angles of herself much to my surprise! Ahem...I need my vitamins- she has outwitted me one too many. I guess I have to turn my cheek, coz this one cannot be revenged.


---
In other news, Maria of the chucking fame finally gave up. After six years of faithfulness, she died. I am not taking her for repair. I will let her rest in peace.

---

Quote line- Hurting people hurt people.

Don't be the one who hurts someone because you're hurting. Vent, give it to Jesus and be clean of your pain.

I am not her boyfriend

Yes. I insist.

I am currently going through a time when sincerely, how can anyone think I am their boyfriend..HMM?

So, I get a call while enjoying cell from a number I do not have stored in my phonebook. I say hallo, and hear a female voice on the other side- let us call her Miss Jackson.

Miss Jackson: Hi.
Nev:Hi.
Miss Jackson: Can you tell me the name of your girlfriend?
Nev: Girlfriend? Hahaha. Who wants to know?
Miss Jackson: You're Nev, aren't you?
Nev: Why?
Miss Jackson: Just tell me the name of your girlfriend, she's on the line and is listening.
Nev: Hahaha... Are you serious?
Miss Jackson: You're nev, aren't you?
Nev: I am, but why are you asking?
Miss Jackson: I want you to tell me the name of your girlfriend, she is on the line, listening.

(It is 7:22pm, Wednesday, do they do any Doctor Love shows at such a time? Moreover, there is need to report Kasubi tombs and Makerere Uni. This cannot be a radio. If it is, maybe it is Wakasanke Fm.)

Nev: But how can I tell you her name when I have none?
Miss Jackson: She is on the line listening. So you're saying you have no girlfriend?
Nev: I am single. Nev is a single dude.
Miss Jackson: You're sure you have no girlfriend?
Nev: I have no girlfriend. I am single.
Miss Jackson: Okay.

(dead tone) She cannot be serious. She just hang up. Hahahaha....

I try calling back two times and Miss Jackson doesn't pick. I say easy.

I jump back to cell..the hymn we're singing is " Bind us together Lord, bind us together, with chords that cannot be broken.....bind us together Lord bind us together, bind us together with Love.....

The irony.

I resume singing the hymn, half laughing! Oh.. my life is interesting... Crank call? They got my name right. So which of you bloggers is upto this? Eh?!!! I have no girlfriend; neither do I have an ex, okay, whoever you are....

It was funny though.

I am hoping to come for BHH though...Rev,I love your new blog. Oh and guys, the porkaty- you're all invited, as long as you give to Ceasar by 25th March his 10k.

on the radio- Miss Jackson- Outkast.